What We Inherit, What We Reject: The Enigma of Stephen Miller

How a descendant of Jewish refugees became the architect of some of America’s harshest immigration policies—and what his story reveals about identity, family, and power.

Apr 28, 2025

Author’s Note

I’ve never met Stephen Miller, and I’m not a psychologist. What I know about him comes from public records, policy decisions, and published interviews with those who have known or studied him—including some of his own relatives. Still, like many people, I find myself wondering: What makes someone choose cruelty? What turns a descendant of Jewish refugees into the architect of policies that punished asylum seekers and separated families?

After I wrote about his job in the trump administration, my sister said, “He sure is a scary person—and how he became so vindictive and cruel is hard to understand.” That sentence stayed with me. It’s not an analysis. It’s a reaction to the human impulse to try and make sense of people who unsettle us.

This isn’t a diagnosis or a personal attack. It’s an inquiry—about history, personality, identity, and what happens when inherited pain is turned outward instead of healed. It’s a story about one man, but also about power, memory, and how easily we forget the lessons our ancestors paid dearly to teach us.

I knew about his place in the Trump administration, but I became curious about Steven Miller — the person.

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Stephen Miller: A Name in the Shadows

Stephen Miller’s name rarely makes headlines, yet his fingerprints are all over some of the most controversial policies of the Trump era—from the Muslim ban to family separation. A senior advisor who preferred the shadows to the spotlight, Miller rose to power as a staunch defender of fortress-like borders and an enemy of immigration.

The twist?

He is the grandson of Jewish refugees who fled persecution in Eastern Europe—a legacy he seems not only to have rejected, but to have turned inside out.

Some of his relatives, like his uncle, have spoken out in dismay, wondering how someone with their shared bloodline could become the symbol of such calculated cruelty. But perhaps part of the answer lies not only in what Miller rejected—but in what he inherited.

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When Truth Is Inconvenient

My father, a physician, once refused to clear a high school football player after noticing an abnormality during a routine physical. Out of caution, he recommended a visit to a heart specialist. Instead of being grateful for finding something potentially serious, and recommending a heart specialist, the boy’s mother became furious—angry that the truth didn’t match her hopes—and took him to another doctor.

That tension between truth and desire is something we still see today: whether in families, politics, or public life. When truth is inconvenient, some will search for a different answer rather than face it.

In Stephen Miller’s rejection of his own family history, and Donald Trump’s curious dance around questions of his mental fitness, the pattern is clear: it’s easier, and sometimes politically advantageous, to deny, deflect, and reshape reality than to confront uncomfortable truths head-on.

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The Words We Whisper

When I was young, I remember how my grandmother would whisper certain words.

“She has cancer,” she would say in a whisper, as if speaking the illness out loud might make it more real—or shameful.

Other words were whispered too:

“He’s black.”

“She’s divorced.”

“He’s different.”

“He’s a cripple…”

Words that reflected reality but were treated like secrets. Words that revealed how uncomfortable truth could be when it didn’t fit into the polite image people wanted to maintain. Or just ignorance about things we didn’t know.

That deep instinct—to treat uncomfortable truths as unspeakable—is not just about illness or race or identity. It is about survival, fear, shame, and denial.

It’s about what happens when saying the truth out loud threatens the illusion of safety.

Stephen Miller’s rejection of his family history.
Donald Trump’s evasions about his cognitive health.
The American habit of forgetting our brutal past while benefiting from its scars.

All of it comes from the same ancient fear:

If we name it, we have to face it.
If we whisper, maybe we can pretend it’s not there. But history, memory, and truth are never erased by whispers.

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Family History: The Glosser Legacy

Stephen Miller’s maternal ancestors, the Glossers, arrived in the United States seeking refuge from the violent pogroms of Eastern Europe in the early 20th century. His great-great-grandfather, Wolf-Leib Glosser, fled Antopol—then part of the Russian Empire, now Belarus—in 1903, with little more than hope and determination.

The Glossers opened a department store in Johnstown, Pennsylvania, a testament to the American Dream. Miriam Glosser Miller, Stephen’s mother, grew up surrounded by community, family, and success. Her memories were filled with lively customers, and the steady hum of a family business built from survival and hard work.

Stephen Miller’s uncle, Dr. David Glosser, later wrote painfully about his nephew’s betrayal of this heritage:

“If my nephew’s ideas on immigration had been in force a century ago, our family would have been wiped out.” (Source: Politico)
For Glosser, and for many who watched Miller’s career unfold, the personal and historical betrayal cut deep.

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Growing Up Different: The Santa Monica Years

Raised in Santa Monica, California, Stephen Miller had a privileged early life. Yet even in a place of opportunity and liberal values, Miller set himself apart.

After financial turbulence in the mid-1990s, following the Northridge earthquake and business troubles, the Miller family downsized. Though still comfortable by many standards, the experience of instability may have marked him.

Although his mother, Miriam Glosser Miller, had grown up in a liberal, immigrant-rooted household, her marriage to Michael Miller marked a shift. Michael was a Reagan Republican—business-focused, wary of government regulation, pragmatic rather than incendiary.

But even those who differed from him politically described Michael Miller as a mensch. “He was a great guy to work with,” said Michael Hirschfeld, who at the time was director of JCRC, “He was committed, he was loyal, he was respectful — he was an all-around good guy.”

Peers described the elder Miller as a Jewish community leader, who served in board posts for a number of philanthropic organizations, including on the national board of Hebrew Union College-Jewish Institute of Religion (HUC-JIR) and the board of directors of The Jewish Federation of Greater Los Angeles.

The Millers also have given generously over the years: From 2013 to 2014, the family donated $25,000 to the American Committee for the Weizmann Institute of Science, a research university south of Tel Aviv, tax documents show. Other recipients include the Republican Jewish Coalition and Stanford Law School.

It’s hard to find much more about him. It would seem that he prefers not to be in the limelight.

Over time, Miriam absorbed some of Michael’s conservative views, and Stephen Miller was raised in a Republican household tucked inside a largely Democratic, progressive community.

This political isolation, layered on top of his personal sense of difference, may have sharpened his early feeling of grievance—and fueled the combative worldview that later defined his public life.

At Santa Monica High School, Miller became known for his inflammatory views:

• He criticized multicultural programs and bilingual education.
• He attacked LGBTQ+ support groups and safe sex education.
• He once ended a friendship in middle school because the classmate was Latino.
Former classmates described him as “rude,” “racist,” and “obnoxious.” For a brief period, he was homeschooled—perhaps in response to conflicts with his peers—before returning to public school, seemingly even more entrenched in his contrarian stance.
From a young age, Miller seemed to choose alienation over belonging, provocation over connection.

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Mother, Identity, and the Rejection of the Past

Miriam Glosser Miller’s upbringing was shaped by her family’s immigrant experience—by the knowledge that survival was precious, and community was essential.

Jewish identity, too, weaves together history, culture, and survival. Even for families like the Millers, who were not deeply religious, those currents run strong.

Judaism is matrilineal: if your mother is Jewish, so are you.

But belonging is never only about blood. It is about memory. Compassion. Solidarity.

I was once married a Jewish man. Although neither of our families practiced much religion, I learned that ancient definitions still quietly shaped who was seen as fully “inside” or “outside” the tradition. It taught me that identity is complicated—that who we are is shaped both by inheritance and by choice.

Stephen Miller, too, had a choice.

He chose to sever empathy from survival.
He kept the memory of struggle but stripped away its lessons.

In doing so, he rejected not just the traditions of his family—but the heart of them.

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The Rise of a Political Operator

After Duke University, Miller found a home among far-right politicians like Jeff Sessions and Michele Bachmann, sharpening his talent for turning grievance into policy.

Joining Trump’s campaign, he became the quiet hand behind some of the loudest outrages:

• The Muslim ban.
• Family separations at the border.
• Asylum restrictions that left vulnerable people in danger.

After leaving the White House when trump lost the 2020 election, Miller founded America First Legal, continuing his crusade to reverse diversity initiatives and restrict immigration through litigation.

If Trump embodied the rage of a movement, Miller engineered its infrastructure—coldly, methodically, relentlessly — and with cruelty.

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Nature, Nurture, and Narcissism

Is Stephen Miller the product of genes, environment, or choice? Some of each?

Perhaps he inherited a temperament prone to rigidity or fear.
Perhaps the sting of early social rejection hardened him.
Perhaps ambition alone steered him toward power, no matter the cost.

But whatever the origins, his choices speak for themselves.

Survivors do not always pass on empathy.
Victims do not always grow into protectors.
Pain, if not healed, can become cruelty.

And sometimes the deepest betrayal comes not from strangers—but from those who should have understood better.

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What the Miller Story Tells Us About America Today

Miller’s journey reflects a larger American tendency: To forget. To close the door behind us. To erase the hard road once traveled.

Trump did not invent this instinct. Miller did not create it. They simply wielded it, polished it, and made it policy.

Stephen Miller’s trajectory indeed raises unsettling questions. He had a privileged upbringing in an upper middle class, Jewish household, in Santa Monica. His parents were highly educated and contributed to the community in positive ways, yet he adopted and championed policies that many view as antithetical to the values of compassion and inclusivity. He became the principal architect of some of the most hateful, immigration policies in recent U.S. history. It seems cruelty is the point. I don’t think his upbringing was the source.

History is important. It can’t really be erased, as has been tried throughout the years. A nation must remember not just how it survived, but what it once promised to be.

Without memory, survival becomes hollow. And cruelty finds a home.

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Closing Reflection

Maybe it’s about how fragile identity really is—and how easily memory can be twisted when fear, ambition, and resentment take the place of belonging.

History doesn’t guarantee empathy.
Family doesn’t guarantee loyalty.
Survival doesn’t guarantee wisdom.

We inherit many things. But what we choose to carry forward—and what we leave behind—is what defines us.

Sources

The following references informed this piece and are provided for further reading.

The Loyalist: The cruel world according to Stephen Miller, David Klion, The Nation, April 2025 issue. https://www.thenation.com/article/politics/stephen-miller-hatemonger-biography/#google_vignette

Stephen Miller Is an Immigration Hypocrite. I Know Because I’m His Uncle, David Glosser, Politico, August 13, 2018. https://www.politico.com/magazine/story/2018/08/13/stephen-miller-is-an-immigration-hypocrite-i-know-because-im-his-uncle-219351/

The White Nationalist Education of Stephen Miller. Jean Guerrero’s book explores how Stephen Miller became one of the most powerful, anti-immigrant White House advisers in history, Andrea González-Ramírez, Aug 7, 2020. https://gen.medium.com/the-white-nationalist-education-of-stephen-miller-3d69f5f19964

Stephen Miller’s early Life, Text interview with David Glosser, Stephen Miller's Uncle. Frontline, June 21, 2019. https://www.pbs.org/wgbh/frontline/interview/david-glosser/

White House Adviser Stephen Miller’s Santa Monica High School Classmates Wonder ‘WTF?’ https://www.thewrap.com/stephen-miller-white-house-adviser-santa-monica-high-school-classmates/?utm_source=chatgpt.com

Stephen Miller is a product of “chain migration,” his uncle says, Emily Stewart, VOX, may 17, 2017. https://www.vox.com/policy-and-politics/2018/8/13/17683054/stephen-miller-family-politico-chain-migration?utm_source=chatgpt.com

Uncle of Trump adviser Stephen Miller voices 'horror' at immigration policies. https://www.theguardian.com/us-news/2018/aug/13/stephen-miller-uncle-david-glosser-immigration-separation

U.S. IMMIGRATION POLICY - Key Player Profile. https://ideaspace.com/player/stephen-miller/

Writings by Stephen Miller while a student at Duke, The Chronicle, 2006-2007 Duke Student Publishing Company, Inc. https://www.dukechronicle.com/search?q=0&page=1&ti=0&tg=0&ty=article&ts_month=0&ts_day=0&ts_year=0&te_month=0&te_day=0&te_year=0&s=0&au=Stephen+Miller&o=date&a=1

How White House advisor Stephen Miller went from pestering Hispanic students to designing Trump's immigration policy. https://www.univision.com/univision-news/politics/how-white-house-advisor-stephen-miller-went-from-pestering-hispanic-students-to-designing-trumps-immigration-policy

From Hebrew school to halls of power: Stephen Miller’s unlikely journey From Hebrew school to halls of power: Stephen Miller’s unlikely journey